Your final arrangements: a 10-point discussion guide
Have this conversation with the people who matter to you. Clear communication about your final arrangements reduces confusion and makes sure your wishes are respected.
Speak openly with those who will listen, and make sure everyone important to you understands your wishes. You don't need to cover all ten points at once. Pick one or two to start, and come back to the rest.
Who speaks for you
Who should make healthcare and financial decisions if you can’t? Have you named them in a healthcare power of attorney and a financial power of attorney?
Your healthcare wishes
What matters most to you if you become seriously ill? Do you have an advance directive or living will, and does your doctor have a copy?
Where your documents are
Where are your will, trust, insurance policies, deeds, titles and account information kept, and who can get to them?
Your finances and bills
Which bank accounts, retirement accounts, recurring bills and debts exist, and who should handle them?
Burial or cremation
Do you prefer burial, cremation or another option? Do you have a cemetery plot, a pre-paid plan or a funeral home in mind?
Your service
What kind of service or celebration of life would you like? Think about music, readings, faith traditions and who should speak.
Paying for arrangements
How will final expenses be covered: insurance, savings or a pre-need plan? Who knows about it?
People to notify
Who should be contacted, including family, friends, your faith community, employer, clubs and professionals?
Belongings and keepsakes
Are there special items you want to go to specific people? Have you written it down?
Your legacy
What stories, values and messages do you want to pass on? How do you want to be remembered?
Related: Why I wrote The Living Legacy Planner · Going into the hospital? Don’t go alone
Would a guided conversation help?
We can help you prepare for the talk, or sit in as a calm, neutral voice. Your first call is free.
